‘Meet You At La Pissoir, Darling’

This is Roskilde’s first festival with female urinals - which is huge. We hung around them in a totally non-creepy way and got all the feedback we could from our vagina-owning friends.

Written by Lucy Coulson

Photography by Sonia Ziegler and Felix Adler

Ughhh. Literally any woman who’s ever been to any festival in the world (okay maybe just the fun ones with alcohol and lots of people and limited toilets) knows how equally infuriating and degrading the gender-based urination situation is. Infuriating, well, because why do girls have to stand in line for hours nearly peeing themselves while men can literally stand and shoot wherever they please — and degrading, because when you get past your fifth beer and all the fucks you once had have disappeared along with your lipstick, you decide to pop a squat and get treated like a damn fool for doing literally what every other man is doing, just at a slightly lower angle.

However, this year, at the 49th Roskilde Festival, things have finally changed. Enter: Lapee. We spoke with the brand-new female urinal’s founder, Gina Périer, in an interview in May, about the process of getting Lapee together, the thought that went into the design and the potential benefits of an invention like this. Furthermore, this year, Roskilde Festival has set up not one, not two, but 48 of them. They’re big and they’re pink, so if you haven’t managed to spot one yet, you might be colorblind or you literally haven’t left your camp chair yet (and it’s filled with pee).

As the urinals are only in their first year of existence, we wanted to hear how they turned out from real people with vaginas and full bladders at the festival. Here are some we spoke to…

Jessie: “I think it’s brilliant. Although they need to sort out something in terms of toilet paper — it’s nonexistent right now. They are very quick to use! But some people feel really exposed so maybe they could add something in front of the opening. Like a curtain or something. I’m alright with it, though. The queue is just so much quicker.”

Johanne: “It’s a really nice initiative. It’s also good they put a lady sticker on them now because men have been using them… which is not really fair. Definitely a better alternative to peeing on the ground.”

Sara: “I think it’s a phenomenal initiative. The festival has really been missing something like this since it’s only guys who have pissoirs… which doesn’t make any sense because women are actually the most exposed. If you think about it, when girls pee, they pee with their crotch and ass exposed and almost up in the air. You can see everything. So it’s about time, I say. Oh, and I think it is so gross that men are using them. There are literally a million places you can pee. Get away from ours.”

Sofie: “I think they’re great, but they shouldn’t just be near the toilets like they are now — they should be where they’re needed, like near the stages when it’s too hard to get to the toilet. I don’t know how many male pissoirs there are, but it should be even. But I guess it’s not. There should actually be more, you know… women have smaller bladders than men so we actually need more than our male friends.”

Sanne: “I think they’re good but people need to stop throwing paper in them because they don’t work when they’re blocked with paper. But it’s fast when there is a line for the normal toilets, so that’s good when you’re rushing to see your favorite band!”

Flora: “I think they’re great! The best thing is you don’t have to wait in queue, like we usually have to do. But they could maybe put a trashcan somewhere? I know there are plastic bags on the side, but they are stolen right away. So maybe if they could put a trashcan somewhere that would be cool. Other than that, they’re great and they’ve improved my festival already.”

Bottom line: they’re not particularly luxurious in terms of hygiene or privacy, and certainly would never be picked over a toilet you can actually sit on with a door that closes and a roll of toilet paper. That being said, they would almost 100% of the time be picked over peeing on the ground while passersby shout, whisper, double-take, comment, glance, give the evil-eye, take videos and photos (seriously, ew) or whatever other form of abuse comes rolling our way if we pop a squat in public. But when you’ve gotta go, you’ve gotta go — ain’t that right, boys?